Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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