We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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