just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize