Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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