i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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