Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
what the fuck happened to the tacos
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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