Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize
