I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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