she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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