i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
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