I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
