I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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