Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize