you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Randomize
