Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
