Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
25 Shocking High School Scandals You Won’t Believe Are True
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.