i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
21 Ladies Reveal The Sexiest Thing A Man Can Do In A Public Setting
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive