erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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