i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I can't turn off my feet"
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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