You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
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We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
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Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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