K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
In America we eat man semen.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Randomize
