I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
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