I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
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