i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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