I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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