New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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