Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
