Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
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