he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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