Pappa wants mamma naked
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize