Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
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Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Still dying that you shit outside
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Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.