So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
My bed smells like the plague
Randomize
