me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
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