he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Randomize
