is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Randomize