Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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