Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
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