At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
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