The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
