Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
