no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
