i used baking grease as lip gloss
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
