i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
Is it penis luge time yet?
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
