did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Randomize
