if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
Swine flu is the new snow day.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
