I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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