doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
