Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Randomize
