Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Randomize