my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
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