hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
i already hear my dad disowning me
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
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