Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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